At least at the moment, because the “scarcity monster” has got me by the throat – or so it feels. Aarrgh!
Normally it lives well hidden in the darker recesses of my brain, but every so often it comes crawling out of its cave and sings its siren song of “I can’t afford that”. Then I end up reluctant to spend money on anything, especially on anything I feel I ought to. For instance, contributing to a charitable cause everybody around me is giving money to and I feel guilty if I don’t, or I don’t want to be seen as miserly. That’s probably because the “scarcity monster” actually does make me miserly.
It also makes me think that I haven’t got enough time to do everything I want to, or feel I ought to do. That’s when I end up feeling stressed and as if I can’t get on with anything. Consequently, I get resentful every time the phone rings. And when I’m in this space, circumstances seem to conspire to prevent me getting on with the tasks on my to-do list.
Ted Hunter, author of “Money Smart: How to Spend, Save, Eliminate Debt and Achieve Financial Freedom”, writes that “a positive attitude is more important to your financial success than how you look, the amount of money you did or didn’t inherit, your level of education, your skills, your job, or a lucky break.”
So how I can “snap out of it” and send the scarcity monster back to where it belongs? I think one way is making a committed effort to change my general outlook from pessimism to optimism. That is a long-term project and may involve therapy, NLP, coaching, meditation etc.
However, bookkeeping and clarity about my financial situation is a key factor. I find cashflow planning particularly useful when I get into this space of seeing only scarcity. If my numbers are up to date, they tell me that I actually have more money available than I thought. After all, numbers are facts.
And I find it useful to write down or mentally list all the things I do have right now, because it brings me back to the present moment. It stops me worrying about the things I want to have in the future, or pining for the things I have had in the past.
Letting go of the do-to list and going with the flow helps me relax when things seem to go wrong. Again a quick factual check of actually writing down what really needs to get done and prioritizing can help to reduce stress. So does taking a few minutes out for some breathing exercises to calm down.
When you come to the end of the day and still fret over all the things you haven’t got round to, make a list of everything you have achieved in the day. Make an effort to note the things you normally take for granted, such as getting the kids off to school on time etc. Then give yourself a mental pat on the shoulder.
Sanni Kruger is a finance coach helping people to become competent and confident money managers who live within their means without stressful money concerns. She assists her clients in reducing their debts whilst building up savings, as well as clarifying their desired long term vision and learning how to expand their resources to reach it. Her self-help book “Making Friends with Money – How to start feeling wealthy without waiting till you’re rich” is available from http://dld.bz/KsG4 .
Sanni is also a motivational speaker with over 30 years experience of speaking to audiences of any size on a variety of subjects.
